Perhaps you don’t own a vibrator yet, or the batteries in your favorite vibe just died on you. Maybe you aren’t a big fan of vibrations or want to rely less on your buzzy buddy. Whatever the reason, it can be difficult to learn how to masturbate without a vibrator, especially if you’re not practiced in it.
Luckily, sex toys aren’t the only way to enjoy a truly satisfying self-pleasure session! In fact, you might look around you and see a whole host of objects you think could make a great replacement. But, I’m telling you now that many aren’t safe options.
Here are our favorite, tried-and-tested ways to masturbate without a vibrator. I’m here to guide you on your path to sex toy-less satisfaction, with details on exactly how to find what works for you.
Fingers
Using your fingers to get off is the most tried and true way out there! Many people get turned off when they can’t get that same immediate pleasure from their hand as they expect from a vibrator. All I’m saying is, don’t write it off just yet.
There are lots of different ways to try masturbating with your fingers. My biggest advice would be to ignore what you might see in porn and don’t go straight for vigorous rubbing. Try gentle circles, up-and-down motions, and even tapping on and around the clitoris — see what sensations you elicit, and find out what feels good for you!
You may not have to touch the clitoris itself! Many vulva-owners actually gain more pleasure from playing around with the clitoral hood (the skin that surrounds the clitoris), especially those with particularly sensitive clitorises. Alternatively, try pressing around the base of the clitoris to stimulate the internal part of the clitoris that extends inside the body.
Whatever you try, don’t be afraid to be generous with the lube. The last thing you want during masturbation is friction, so lube up your fingers and vulva and get experimenting!
A Pillow
Clitoral stimulation is really the star of the show for most vulva-owners when comes to masturbation. That’s where grinding comes in.
Grab a fairly firm pillow and straddle it. You may prefer sitting upright, or lying on your stomach — it’s up to you. Then, try out different grinding movements, moving your hips back and forth, side to side and so on, until you find a groove that feels great.
If you want something even firmer, you can try a rolled-up towel instead. Or, if you’re still craving more stimulation, slide your fingers down against your clitoris and grind against them. Just make sure to use some lube to get everything good and slippery.
Shower
The good old shower head — another DIY masturbation classic.
Simply hold the shower head and aim the water jets at your clitoris until you find an angle that feels good. Keep the water at a low temperature to avoid any scalding and play around with the pressure.
Masturbating in the shower is more hygienic than many other methods, and is also private and discreet, which many people prefer. However, try not to get too much water in the vagina itself, as this can potentially mess with your natural pH balance and cause bacterial or yeast infections.
If you’re not blessed with a removable shower head, you can also use the faucet in your tub. Just scoot your butt down to the end of the bathtub and find a position where your clit is under the running water. If you find this tricky (and I wouldn’t blame you), you could try using a water diverter like the Waterslyde. This product funnels water from the faucet down to the (much more reachable) mid-line of your tub so it can run onto your clit in a more comfortable way.
A Massager
If you’re looking around for how to masturbate without a vibrator, then your eyes may well turn to other household objects. There are a lot of household items out there that vibrate these days. Yet, I would, for safety reasons, recommend you stay away from most of them, like electric toothbrushes or phones.
However, there are a couple of exceptions. A vibrating silicone face cleanser, for example, is made of body-safe materials and, once thoroughly cleaned, can be used for clitoral or g-spot stimulation. If you want to be extra safe, cover your massager with a condom first. Plus, avoid inserting anything that’s not made from a non-porous material!
Our Expert Tips for Masturbating Without a Vibrator
Masturbating without a vibrator can be tough for some, especially if you’re not used to it. Here are some ways that you can boost your enjoyment of your vibrator-less sessions, and boost your knowledge of your body, too!
Make Sure to Set the Mood
Using a vibrator often means that we don’t have to spend so long getting in the mood. Many people love them for the way they let you just crank out an orgasm whenever you want!
However, that means that we can be left a bit helpless when we don’t have one to rely on. If you want to masturbate without a vibrator, it’s worth taking some extra time to really get yourself aroused. This will help you feel less stressed and most probably more likely to orgasm!
Turn the lights down, get comfy in bed (or wherever you chose), and treat yourself. You could also get the help of some ethical porn or erotica to inspire your imagination.
Try Different Positions
Lying on your back may come most naturally when masturbating, but there are other positions that are worth exploring! Try sitting and leaning against a wall or another surface. This can actually be more comfortable, and it has the added bonus of allowing you to more easily see what you’re doing.
You could also try lying on your stomach, or prop yourself on all fours. The sky’s the limit, really.
Try Mindfulness
Masturbating without a vibrator often takes a lot longer than with one, which can unfortunately feel frustrating or boring for many. However, why not try to take advantage of ‘taking the scenic route’ during your sexy sessions and revel in the sensations you experience?
If you want to get in touch with yourself during masturbation, then using your hands or another manual method can help. Find out what your body wants and likes by taking things slow and being mindful about what you’re doing and the effect it’s having. This may also help you to move away from focusing solely on the orgasm — there’s so much more to enjoy during masturbation!
You could even watch yourself in a mirror! Notice not only what your hands are doing, but the movements your body makes and how you react to different types of stimulation. This can help you feel much more connected to yourself as a sexual and pleasurable being!
What NOT to Use to Masturbate
Now we’ve gone over lots of good ways to masturbate without a vibrator, it’s time for some warnings.
A lack of a good sex toy can cause some people to get desperate and make some unwise decisions when it comes to what they put near their genitals. Here are some things that have no place being used for masturbation:
- Food — you should steer well clear of any food items when looking for an alternative to a vibrator or dildo. They aren’t sanitary and can cause all kinds of infections. They might even break off inside you — gross. Try these body-safe food-shaped dildos instead!
- Household objects made of unsafe materials — I touched on this earlier, but there are lots of vibrating objects that aren’t safe to go near your genitals, including those with sharp or breakable pieces, or those made from porous materials.
- Vacuum cleaner — do not, under any circumstances, try to use a vacuum cleaner to get some clitoral suction going. Not only are they inherently unclean, but you could cause yourself some serious damage.